So what have they told you? That only physically attractive people have the right to self-confidence? That you either have it in you or you don’t?
Let’s face it, confidence is the key to anything and everything. Right from driving a car to handling work to dating, confidence is what separates the proverbial wheat from the chaff.
What you need to remember is that the mind speaks the body language. Conversely if you change your body language, then it has an impact on the mind as well.
Mr.Hunched Over
This guy is the classic example of a person who just doesn’t like himself. The world is a mighty dangerous place for him. Just look at the way he walks. Shoulders all hunched over, head down as he shuffles rather than walk. Mr. Hunched Over generally finds it difficult to look people in the eye as he speaks and he last is handshake is as limp as his mind. He crosses his arms tightly, touches his nose all the time to see if it has grown since he lied through it.
Mr. Walk the Walk and Talk the Talk
This chap is diametrically the opposite of the first kind. He exudes an air of confidence in his walk, manner and speech. He has a confident stride which is helped by the fact that he stands to his height with his head held high, chin tucked in and shoulders squared back.
This is what gives him the confidence as this posture is designed for efficiency. Mind you, he isn’t ram rod straight, just straight enough so that his ears are in line with his shoulders and hips.
The chest is also out since the shoulders are drawn back towards the hip. This facilitates deep, even and diaphragmatic breathing which prevents anxiety. His hand shake is firm.
As he offers his hand, he exerts just the right pressure on the other person’s hand to indicate a strong grip. This is no wrestling bout, so the confident man always exerts just the right kind of pressure in a hand shake. He maintains eye contact with the person he is talking to; not a staring about, but normal eye contact, one which won’t make the other person conscious of being stared at.
He looks away from time to time to give his eyeballs a rest. This is why he comes across as genuine and not shift eyed and restless.
To be Mr.-Or- Ms. Walk the Walk
Always square your shoulders and keep your head held high when you walk. You might seem imperious or high handed at first, but then it will work wonders on your self-esteem and you will begin to feel differently about yourself. You needn’t even be a tall person to come across as cool and confident–just stand up to your own height and see the miracle.
Breathe slowly steadily and deeply. Use your abdominal muscles to draw in your breath rather than engaging your neck muscles which end up making you a shallow breather and plus you also tend to hunch easily if you don’t feel your rib cage and stomach expand as you breathe in.
Practice standing and speaking in front of the mirror. It will show you exactly how you appear to others. Practice your walk in front of a video camera and keep a record of your metamorphosis.
